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I’m tired.

No, I’m not “I have 4 children under the age of 5 and don’t remember what it feels like to take a shower” tired.  I’m not “grad school is killing me, so much to read, so much to process, so much to write…when do I sleep?” tired.  I’m “all I do is work.  That’s it.  Work. Come home.  Do adult/responsible things like laundry and dishes.  Look at the clock as I’m turning on Netflix and realize that I have to be up in less than 7 hours, so forget watching Sherlock tonight because tomorrow you get to do this all over again” tired.

Ok – so the fact that I occasionally do get to watch Sherlock on Netflix is nice.  And I am grateful to have a job (even if my boss and I are managing the workload of 4+ people between us).  I think it’s just exhausting to not have time for anything else.

For example, today’s super-fun, living-it-up-in-the-big-City schedule:

  • Wake up
  • Work out
  • Get ready
  • Walk to the subway where I have my first human interaction of the day with the school crossing guard who always says, “Good morning!”  (I like her.)
  • Subway it to work with a bunch of grumpy strangers
  • Work non-stop for most of the day
  • Get back on the subway with a bunch of grumpy, but more tired, strangers
  • Realize, as I’m walking to my apartment, that tonight is THE night I MUST do laundry – ugh.
  • Sort clothes, start dinner
  • Schlep my dirty clothes and detergent to the laundromat – start the wash
  • Rush back home, continue making dinner
  • Rush back to the laundromat to put clean, wet clothes in the dryer
  • Rush home to inhale dinner
  • Rush back to the laundromat to bring home damp clothes – hang them all over my apartment hoping they air dry by the morning
  • Do all the dishes that have been piling up over the week (did I mention my roommate is out of town?)
  • Quickly put the clean sheets back on my bed (ahhhh….my favorite thing!)
  • Take 10 minutes to blog about how being a grown-up sucks while finishing off the frozen cookie dough I started thawing when I initially got home
  • Wash my face, brush my teeth, floss (can’t forget to floss, people) and go to bed

Only to do it all over again tomorrow.

Fine – I won’t do laundry again tomorrow.  BUT, there’s always something responsible and grown up that needs to be done.  And when you’re a singleton, there’s no divide and conquer.  Maybe my married friends are smiling and thinking, “Oh, that poor delusional girl — there’s no divide and conquer when you’re married, either.”  BUT, let me have that dream.  And even if there’s not, there’s the whole “having someone to come home to” bit.  I can’t help but think that might be nice and would make thankless, lame laundry nights be a little more bearable.  (Ummm…did I mention my roommate is away on business?  Guess I miss her.)

I know I’m not the only one who occasionally feels like their life is one annoying merry-go-round where you feel like you see the same scenery and do the same thing over and over again, without actually getting anywhere.  AND I don’t want to complain (too much), but I’m just telling it like it is.  Sometimes there’s no glamour to living in NYC.  I am annoyed that work is taking over my life.  I miss having things to do, people to see, and the time for fun things during the week.  Somedays, there’s very little to look forward to.  I suppose that’s life – regardless of the age, stage, or season.

Anyway, I’m off to bed so I can face tomorrow’s list of same old annoying tasks.  Maybe I’ll have to make a point to say hello to the school crossing guard first, just to spice things up.

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